hextraterrestrial: Hextraterrestrial (Default)
Fred came screeching into Angela's garage. With a slam of the brakes he placed the vehicle in park and got out, slamming the car door shut behind him. Letting himself into the house, Fred quickly found his package on the table. He took a long, hard look at it before he tore into the box. Inside the white cardboard box he found the black Alienware tablet carefully packed away in bubble wrap. He thought of unwrapping the package but then thought better of it. Instead he grabbed the entire box and stormed back into the garage. He opened the door to his orange Pinto and placed the box in the passenger seat. He stuffed his keys into the ignition, strapped his belt and closed the car door. With no regard for Angela's concrete flooring, Fred shifted the gears into reverse and slammed the pedal to the floorboard. A screech of tires and billowing smoke manifested as his vehicle tore across the garage floor, leaving two smoking skid marks on the garage floor. The Pinto was fully enveloped in tire smoke when Fred whipped the wheel, causing the ass-end of his Pinto to slide wildly sideways. For a moment Fred felt nearly weightless as the vehicle pivoted over the rear axle. He let a rather sinister laugh escape his lips and then grinned. For some reason he thought of the Chesire Cat when stomping down on the accelerator. The engine roared and gravel sprayed across the yard. A huge cloud of dust rose into the sky. He swirled the wheel left, then turned it right, and then brought it back to the middle as he desperately tried to keep his car centered. Upon leveling out, Fred reached to the dash and turned the knob on the radio.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ock73QRJBto

Fred drove for for nearly an hour before pulling into a parking lot of a small park. He read the big red letters on the sign as he passed:

"Skimmer Park"
"Fire Danger: High"

He flew past the sign towards the shade of a couple of cedar trees. As he approached, he yank'd the lever of the emergency brake sending the Pinto into a controlled slide. He chuckled to himself as he skid to a complete stop. Fred turned the key and the engine sputtered a moment before dying. Fred's body felt like it was still vibrating while he lit himself a cigarette. He took a deep, long drag then began the process of unpacking the Alienware from its packaging. Placing the tablet on his lap, he took another pull from his smoke. Just then, Fred's phone beeped. He took the phone from the dashboard and swiped it open.

To: Fred Mudi

From: unknown_dude

"Glad you could make it. Go ahead and power up the device. When the text box appears, type in":

"Revolt and War in the Pantheon: A Lot Of Who, A Little Why, Some What, And A Hint Of When"

Fred did as instructed and finished by punching the enter key. The screen went black and two green circles appeared. Just as a look of confusion formed across his face, his phone beeped once more.

To: Fred Mudi

From: unknown_dude

"Good, now put your face close to the screen while aligning the green circles over your eyes."

Fred followed the instructions. Just as the circles crossed his pupils, the tablet unlocked revealing a background image of the puppets from the movie "Team America". The whole screen suddenly dimmed and another text box appeared. Fred rolled his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. Dropping his head, Fred let out a sigh and quietly waited. His phone beeped shortly thereafter.

To: Fred Mudi

From: unknown_dude

Ok, now press "Ctrl+J"

Fred did as he was told and the screen turned a fluorescent orange. Another text box appeared and his phone beeped yet again. Swiping the screen, he opened the messaging app.


To: Fred Mudi

From: unknown_dude

Now type in the following and hit enter: "01110011 In Cold Blood"

Fred groaned and proceeded to peck the sequence in. The screen faded to black before rebooting. Two minutes later, the image of Team America reappeared on screen; one by one, a plethora of icons loaded themselves onto the desktop.

Another beep and swipe.

To: Fred Mudi

From: unknown_dude

"Ok be careful here. Any misstep will lock us out from here. On the desktop there should be a black, red and white icon in the shape of a Chinese dragon. Click it open."

Fred double-clicked the icon and the tablet proceeded to boot up a small C++ Python application window. Fred stared blankly at the app. His eyes were drawn to the blinking green cursor on the black screen. His phone beeped.


To: Fred Mudi

From: unknown_dude

"Ok, now we have some fun. The Conglomerate will rue the day they crossed you Mudi. Dont touch anything until I say. I'm going to remotely take it from here."

Fred watched as the mouse pointer suddenly began to move on its own accord. The pointer moved over the Python App and Fred was stunned at how fast text began appearing on screen.

----- 041918: Packet Sniffer Initiated. Cray7, BPF Filter Rerouting to Port 88. Count Parameter Specification: 042018: CPython, IronPython, Juche, Jython (101), MicroPython, Numba, PyPy, Stackless Python, Taedong (666)

Dialects
Cython, RPython, 항문 누출 7.02, 高科技講者 3.4

Influenced by
A51, ABC, ALGOL 68, AUnderground, C, C++, D, D++, Dylan, Haskell, Icon, Java Twelve, Lisp, Modula-3, Perl

Influenced by
Blowout 1.1, Bolo (4), Boo, Cern 2.2, Cobra, CoffeeScript, D, Dirty Dawg+, F#, Falcon, Genie, Go, Groovy, Haji2, JavaScript, Julia, Lil' Kim Ill, Nim, Overshot (3), Pizza+, Plough2, Ruby, Quant 77, Swift, Wachadoo 2.0, Xenophobia 1.16, ZetaRet001

LHS = sqrt(b2 * (b + 1) - (b + 1))
= sqrt((b + 1) * (b2 - 1))
= sqrt((b + 1) * (b + 1) * (b - 1))
= (b + 1) * sqrt(b - 1)
= b * sqrt(b - 1) + sqrt(b - 1)
= sqrt(b3 - b2) + sqrt(b - 1)
= RHS

VX Heaven WW3.1

Execute in 2.58, ELF Freq 0.04, Delay URFUCT 5/5, Mandela Offset 33.01.11.01, F-Bombx3, KKK Killer 4.0, Nazi Killer 7.2, omni/end/reboot

with love: unknown_dude

The tablet's screen flickered red, white and black repeatedly for approximately 5 seconds before going blank. A couple of seconds later, the tablet shut down and then rebooted. When the desktop image of Team America had been loaded, a text box opened and the other words came in quick:

"Alright Mudi. It's all yours. I'll catch up with you soon. Dont forget your sunglasses, it might get bright out there tonight."

"What?"

"It's cool, nevermind."

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